Wednesday, April 09, 2014

on taking care of body.

Sometimes a shitty thing happens and sometimes it’s a blessing in disguise. Lately, I’d been very concerned with having a boy to hang out with and kiss and be weird with, knowing full well a relationship was off the cards. But now that it’s become evident that even casual hook-ups are fraught with problems, I’m aware of how tunnelled my vision had become. And last night’s seven or eight tears somehow cleared my vision. I still felt pretty poo today (especially since I was tutoring for four hours) but I had decided that, regardless of outside factors, I was still an okay person and I deserved to treat myself as such.

So I went to Weight Watchers after college and discovered that instead of gaining 6 – 10 lbs in chocolate weight, I’d actually lost 1.5 lbs since my last visit about three weeks ago. Considering my diet over the past few weeks, this loss seems divine. Joining Weight Watchers felt strange to me at first because I wasn’t certain of my reasons for doing it. I’m still not certain. But there is no harm in eating healthy foods and trying to get a couple of hundred extra steps into my day. In any case, I’ve been feeling pretty body positive lately anyway. I’ve decided that my body is a wonderful thing because look at all the wonderful things it can do! I can walk and jog and jump and dance (like a dad at a wedding in the ‘80s) and bend and lift. I can have sex and maybe (one day) have babies. When I get a cold or an upset tummy, my body does this miraculous thing: it gets better. That’s pretty cool, right? Everyone likes to feel pretty but for me, for now, it’s enough to marvel at the things my body is capable of.

My body can do all these wonderful things and if I want that fun to continue, then I’ve got to look after my body. And part of the reason I ventured back to Weight Watchers tonight was because last Saturday’s hangover almost rendered me kaput. Having drank hella cider and tried to cure the alcohol illness with McDonald’s breakfast, Subway, pizza, BBQ wings, an inordinate amount of Lucozade, Diet Coke, and Club Orange – to no avail – I realised that my body was staging a protest. My stomach was all full up and the contents were going nowhere (I know, I’m sorry). I ended up spewing into the toilet at 12 am and resolved to cop on to myself. I think that generally your body will give you hints about how it’s feeling but in this case my body was giving me the middle finger. Sorry, body.

So I’m back on track (ish) with lots of vegetables and fibre and I’m going to up my water intake. My skin has been a little dull lately, partly due to stress, partly due to poor diet. My skin is my number one favourite physical feature but I’d been neglecting it lately. I guess I have combination skin – notorious dry patches alternated with oily patches and the occasional blackhead (blurgh). I gave my face a good scrub with a baking soda paste and treated the one or two spots with a drop of tea tree oil. I always feel a bit funny about putting chemical-laden lotions and potions on my face. The rest of my body, whatver, but since my face is the thing facing the world and the weather and the elements every day, I’d rather not add to the damage by piling on the chemicals. My face is now scrubbed clean with all the dead skin washed down the sink. Yum. (There are some excellent tutorials and recipes for home-made and natural face masks and scrubs as well as natural spot treatments around cyberspace and they’re all pretty easy on the purse-strings.)

Face-wise, I’m also going to leave my eyebrows alone for a while. Every so often, I get a little tweezer-happy and am left with not eyebrows but excuses for eyebrows for which an eyebrow pencil can only do so much. I’m going au naturelle in the brow region for the next while in the hopes that I’ll have something to work with when I next sponsor myself for a professional shaping and tinting. (Speaking of au naturelle, pubes are back in. Not that I’m a follower of body hair trends but sometimes it’s nice to know I’m on the side of the majority.)

For more photos of my face and life and food, follow me on Instagram:  
 @emmanorrisbbz

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