I get this feeling way too often. I don’t know. It’s strange. I’m not lacking friends. I have lovely friends. But sometimes I genuinely feel invisible. Or like I don’t exist. When you text everyone and no one texts back. Well, one lovely girl does. But I think I am dead only she can see me. This is a strange thought process, isn’t it? It’s late. And I’m annoyed at you.
I’m annoyed at you but I don’t want to talk about it here. I wanted to talk about it with you but you’re otherwise engaged. Maybe. Maybe just ignoring me. Who knows really? This is sad though. I kind of feel betrayed.
I want the grant to hurry up. I want UL not to be such a f*cking sh*thole at times. The computer system is down so I can’t even check to see if my bank details are correct so that I actually do get my grant if it ever decides to make an appearance. It shall be a poor Christmas in this house, lads. Well, no, the only reason I do want this grant to hurry up (apart from needing to buy clothes and pay for college accommodation) is because I have this arty kind of idea and I need to buy supplies. I anticipate that these supplies will cost approximately €7.85. So I’m waiting on two grand so that I can spend a tenner on paint and tracing paper. Woo.
Also, telly’s sh*t. Although, Frankie Boyle is sort of amusing. I don’t normally like him. He’s a bit too vulgar for me. Even though I am the most vulgar person I know. Anyway. Yeah. He’s funny. Sort of. Just tonight.
The weather’s a bit … snowy? I don’t know. It’s white anyway. And cold. I assume it’s snow. My nose is cold. You know when you breathe in and your whole head and lungs feel icy? I have that. I bought a fun hat though last week, to stave off frostbite of the ears. Of course, I haven’t really left the house much since. Study week is lonely. And not at all studious. What a waste. However, I’ve been eating copious amounts of vegetables and Weetabix. So that’s something. And I’m heavily insulated. In the form of body fat. It’s great.
Erm, to sum up, life is a bit meh at the moment. I suspect it shall improve somewhat tomorrow when I consume alcohol with my long lost friends. Might even wear lipstick. Yes, I am that reckless.