damn, emma, what happened to avoiding alcohol? fuck it. i have about half a can in my system and already i'm feeling sorry for myself. i really need to get a grip. hmm. i need a bit more literature in my life. and a lot less love. ugh.
what is wrong with me? summer. that's what's fucking wrong with me. i shouldn't be allowed have free time.
i wish i could just switch off my brain. or my heart. or both. go into hibernation and see how i feel in a few weeks.
those blasted emo tablets. i don't know. relapse time, i think. i wish it wasn't so. it's not. it's just the mood i'm in. static erratic. get a grip, emma, please. i'd nearly take a few now but i know it wouldn't work the way i want it to. does anything ever?
life will be amazing one day when i am in college and have a bit of a job and have a little bit of money and something of a social life. life could be amazing tomorrow but i don't know just what has to change in order for that to be. what is 'amazing' anyway? someone, please, offer a bit of insight.